Actually, from humorist Dave Barry. As I was headed up the stairs to bed a few minutes ago (too late, I know, but we had all stayed up to watch The Truth About Cats and Dogs, a film that I find more fun than the typical romantic comedy), Alyson put in my hand the January 1 page from her Classic Dave Barry quote-a-day calendar, vis:
I bet you know somebody who always looks terrific; somebody who manages to devote plenty of time to both family and career; somebody whose house is spotless, whose children are well behaved, and whose dog does not smell as if it sleeps on a bed of decomposing raccoons. You wonder how that person “does it all,” don’t you? Well, stop wondering and do something! Get up off the sofa, put on some active sportswear, and kill that person with a crowbar! No, seriously, you need to make some New Year’s resolutions so that you can become a better you—a more attractive you; an organized you; a you that is... well, less like you.
Mr. Rogers may have used to like you “just the way you are,” but apparently Dave doesn’t! The good news is that, at least in this respect, God is more like Fred Rogers than Dave Barry. God, though, may not wear dorky Oxford sneakers and zipper sweaters knitted by his mother. (The last sentence, about God’s dress, probably shows that I’m getting too tired, which reminds me: one of my own resolutions is to get enough sleep for my brain to work.)
So g’night, and God bless.
P.S.— Here’s the link to Dave’s blog. Follow it at your own risk.
